We live in a chaotic and imperfect world. A world of traffic jams, train delays, and cancelled flights. In our personal relationships our children, our parents, and our partners sometimes respond to our love and kindness in ways which can hurt us. During the current economic crises many of our material assets have dropped in value leaving us with a feeling of utter helplessness. All of the above can create strong feelings of guilt, fear, and anger, which can have a negative impact on both our emotional and physical state. We all make mistakes, and although it is important to try to better ones lot in life, each and every one of us must on a daily basis come to a point where we are at peace with ourselves. Learning the art of acceptance is a valuable tool in living in the moment.

Being brought up in a Jewish home feeling guilty was a part of ones culture. This guilt may have started at 8 days by getting circumcised and thinking ‘ what have I done to deserve this’, just kidding, but it carries on through ones adult life. Whether we are Jewish or Gentile the fact is guilt is a disease of nice people. Horrible, evil and dishonest individuals never feel guilty. People such as Charlie Manson and Adolf Hitler had a clear conscience while committing terrible crimes. Guilt can play havoc with our health and well being by leading us to poor eating habits and obesity. For many guilt leads to drugs and depression. We must find the cause of our guilt and use professional help if necessary, for it will not only stop us moving forward but can completely paralyse us. We need to mentally put our guilt each day in a box, seal it and think that we are dropping it into the sea. By ridding ourselves of guilt we can accept ourselves and start living.
Acceptance is something that is part of a good golfers game. When one makes a bad shot minimal time should be used to understand how the ball got into the bunker. If one cant come to terms with our previous shot and cant let go, our focus will be blurred and another poor shot is likely to happen. Life and golf need to be played the same way. The only way to move forward on the course and in life is to accept where we are. The ability to learn acceptance can make us grow both physically and spiritually. The expression ‘there is no progression without resistance’ is absolutely true. In the gym we use weight training (resistance) to create an overload on our muscles to make us stronger.

Lance Armstrong over came cancer to become one of the greatest athletes who ever lived. Even the bible describes how the children of Israel were made to wander for forty years in the desert in order to strengthen their faith before entering the Promised Land. In all these previous situations acceptance of the now lets us move to a better future.During my divorce 16 years ago I was filled with anger and thought the world was on my shoulders. I could not accept my situation and although I hid my feelings well I was becoming ill internally. I thought I was fit since I could do a marathon, hundreds of press-ups, and I had a six-pack, but I was far from healthy. My problem was simple; I could not accept my lot in life and how I got to this terrible moment. Through the help of friends, family, and professionals I soon discovered that if one cant change ones situation one needs to change ones attitude to it. It was only through accepting my present state and giving up the anger and guilt did things start to improve. Not only did things get better but also I actually get stronger and wiser from it. There is no question that my problems made me a better man.

As we enter this holiday season all of us will reflect on the year past. It has for all I’m sure been a year of good and bad, however the most important thing is to realise time moves forward. If we want to change things for the better we must get rid of our anger, guilt, and fear. We need to accept where we are and if we need to address ourselves physically or spiritually help is at hand. I wish to all of you a happy and healthy holiday season.

Josh